Thursday, February 08, 2007

Dearest Oma...

Dear Oma,

How are you? I love you.

I have to admit something to you. Where shall I begin?

You, with your infinite skills, loving heart, and quite possibly the fastest knittin' hands in all the west, blessed the Hubs and I with a beautiful cream coloured afghan for our wedding. It is a gift that is so very dear to us, as it was handmade by you, our favourite Oma, and because it is so very practical. It keeps us warm in the evenings as we read our books, or watch 'American Idol' ( a show that continues to bring me to tears of embarrassment for contestants that cannot come to the realization that they sound like donkeys...in labour...(as far as I can ponder what a donkey in labour would sound like...EEEEEEeeeeeee OoooooooNNNNNNN-N-N-ENuffff Alreeeeeeeeady..)

To be honest I'm not sure what keeps us coming back to the show...perhaps it's the idea that we could do so much better, the idea that in our safe little living room we are as bold as Simon Cowell himself. Who's Simon Cowell you ask Oma?? welllll....he's a British man that we would describe as 'Freg' in dutch or 'bold' in english and he's so right on the money, I'd take his critiques over Paula 'the judge that claps like slippery the seal' any day.

Anyway, ahem, back to the afghan.... I know you made it with wonderful intentions, a new husband and wife, a new warm blanket for us to share....to cuddle with, to warm ourselves on cold evenings,......... Well, it ain't happenin' Oma.

The hubs and I have fought over this precious 'love blanket' since the day it was brought in, over the threshold. The Hubs seems to think that because he has size 13 feet, he's entitled to the 'love blanket' because it's larger than the other one. (and let me say 'the other one' is like donning lace on a frigid eve, It's not even worthy of being called a blanket,....more like a negligee..) Whomever wraps themselves in the 'love blanket' first after dinner, is considered the champion, they will enjoy hours of warmth and comfort, whilst the other is quietly conspiring on how to ditch the negligee and snatch the 'love blanket'.

I've been known to take the prize with me to the washroom, I know you think that's disgusting Oma, but I couldn't leave it lying on the recliner for fear of having the negligee replace it by the time I finish. Regardless of how fast I am, the hubs is always on the alert, I MUST remain on my game.

You think that we should learn to share. That WOULD be the nice thing to do....unless you're both overweight and look like 2 pigs...well, ... in a blanket.

Therefore, I have a request. If I provide the wool for a second blanket...could you perchance, with those loving and speedy hands, knit a 'peace blanket' for the hubs for his birthday in October? It would be the best gift you could give ... me.

With All My Love,

Leanne.

4 comments:

Judi said...

LOL! I love this. I am so totally addicted to American Idol. And you are right Simon hits it right on. Too bad I can't knit or I would make you a blanket! Sorry.

Our 4 Munchkins...6 pigtales & a buzzcut! said...

Hey Leanne, i would so knit you a blanket..lol but I have tried to knit and well lets just say thats its not my forte...at all!! Hope you get your blanket !!

Chrissy

Fiddledeedee (It Coulda' Been Worse) said...

Now, that is funny. You take it with you to the bathroom. I would totally do that! I've been known to take the remote with me as well.

Dana said...

leanne, you really are such a hoot! I hope that dear Oma is speedily knitting a Peace blanket as I write! LOL