Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Hairless..

The Farming wife's 20 minute makeover
The kids were glued to the television and I saw my golden opportunity arrive. It was now or never. I briskly walked to the shower and undressed in a flash.
Lathered, rinsed....no time to repeat.
After running a brush through my sad hair-do, I decided it was time to take matters into my own hands. Renovating an attic is no small expense, and hair styling is the first "unnecessary cost" to go, as voted by the Hubs....just wait 'til he sees what I can do with a pair of scissors....Hair styling may promptly return to the top of the necessary list.
Once I had the shiny pair of scissors in my hot little hand...there was no looking back....there were clumps folks. Clumps and piles.
Anyone with curly hair knows there isn't much damage you can do .... until you finally get around to straightening your hair...and then ...well... I haven't got that much time on my hands so, I kept cutting.
The entire bottom layer came off so easily, I decided to tackle some layers of my own...I would have to say the back of the head is certainly most difficult....but heck ...I can't see back there anyway.
I threw some gel into the mop and I'd have to say it turned out fantastically....it's still wet mind you, and there is a good chance I'll be kicking myself once it dries and curls up like a poodle on a humid summers day....but so far.. things are looking good.
Next, came the removal of raccoon eyes from last nights mascara...it never comes off in the shower....so I treated myself to a cold cream application...and even styled those shaggy eyebrows.
I ran upstairs to find some clothing to cover the ever growing belly...the choices are few and far between these days...and while I was going through the drawers, I stumbled upon an old nail polish bottle and decided to sit on the bed and give myself a pedicure...it had to be quick as I shook the polish hoping it would congeal into something usable.....I could hear running water on the floor below, and knew that the TV was no longer babysitting the hooligans.
Beside the nail polish was a rusty hair clip and a blingy watch (with several stones missing) ....so I threw them on, and by golly...I was starting to look dy-no-mite!
I came downstairs and realized I had forgotten to shave the armpits....they needed a haircut worse than my head hair .... so off I went to find the razor. There was no soap left in the pump...so I stole the little bit that was residing on the dispenser, and Ta-daa there was just enough for a lather.
Within 20 minutes I had unveiled a whole new me....it was fabulous. It was a good thing I had done all this dolling up as I had a hot date with the rice box that had been dragged into the living room and been dumped.
Bliss I tell you...

8 comments:

girlebert said...

WHAT??? NO Picture of the fabulous new you?? We can't just be left here biting our nails and dangling our toes over the chair, as we wait in EXTREME suspense!!!
Heres hoping to a pic today:)
Love ya

Our 4 Munchkins...6 pigtales & a buzzcut! said...

You really are wayy too funny girl! And yes I too would have loved to see a picture of the new you. You are brave to tackle your hair with scissors on your own..i don't think I coulda done it!

Coach J said...

So, how's the hair today? I can't imagine taking scissors to my own hair--it's fine and straight BTW. But, my hat's off to YOU!

Dana said...

Hey, I was totally expecting a picture! It's absolutely NO FAIR to NOT post a picture...you get us all excited and there's NO picture?! SO....in your next spare minute....take a picture! Will ya?!?!? I hope you're still happy with it. I did that one time. I had just got a haircut....a really BAD one and was convinced I could've done better....SO, I took me som scissors into the shower and with a little snip and clip, it was a whole new me! It actually DID look better than the beautician had done!

Mandalyn said...

That so describes a mom's way of having to get ready when she's at home with her small ones! Sometimes I just stay in my pajamas with my hair pulled back all day! Congrats to you on pulling it off!:) How's the hair now? You are so brave! You should take a picture now and show us!!!

Frazzled Farm Wife said...

Hey, I found you at Coach J's blog...I am also a farm wife so I thought I would check you out!

Nin said...

Yes, a picture! You can't leave us all hanging, lol!

Elizabeth said...

HA HA! What a funny story, I loved it and bet you look "marvelous" :)